My Husband has no “Drawers” in his Drawers….(A Confession)
….and something’s gotta give!
I hope the title of this post got your attention. I know it got my husbands as I left the draft opened on my laptop. lol After I explained to him why I chose the title, he was OK with me letting the world know that he has no clean undies in his drawer. 😉
Okay, so………I’ve tried writing this post a few times already and I had a really hard time putting my thoughts into words but I will try.
Get ready for the ultimate confession.
Blogging and my time on the computer has consumed me. My laundry is out of control (and that is probably the understatement of the year). My kids feel like they aren’t important. My relationship with God and my family has suffered. It’s time for a change. FINALLY.
God has been speaking to my heart for such a long, long time regarding this matter. I shared with my contributors in an email recently and with my dear friend, Dawn, that I’ve made blogging, this blog, blog surfing, blog envy, social media, etc. an idol. My blog stats have stressed me out. Wondering why my numbers (pageviews) have dropped has had me cranky and frustrated. My poor husband literally has not had clean “drawers” in his dresser drawers in months. I rummage through clean baskets of laundry every.single.day so that he, me and the kids have something clean to wear. THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE!
And my husband, he has been SO patient with me. He knows how important my blog, having time to do something for “me” is but I can’t keep on like this. I’m constantly feeling like I live in chaos. Always rushing out to get my kids to school on time (most days by the skin of my teeth) because what am I doing? Checking Facebook, my email, my blog, etc. My family needs to know and FEEL how important THEY are to me. The other day my oldest daughter (who has been acting out something fierce lately) starts crying and says “You never play with us. All you care about is your blog. You’re always on the computer”. Thankfully God had already been working on my heart and preparing me for what I’m going to say next so I was able to admit to her that she was right and that I was going to do something about it.
I’m taking a break. It’s going to be more like a fast. I need to do this. I’m shooting for 40 days. During that time I will not be checking Facebook or Twitter and I will not be blogging. I am disabling my Twitter and Facebook apps on my phone as well as my emails. I can’t stay offline completely due to other obligations but I will be limiting those times to after bedtime or nap time.
I recently read a post on blog etiquette and it got me thinking of all these bloggers who have turned their blogs into a full time business. And while I’ve made money blogging and it’s come in handy many times, I often thought that I just don’t think I could do this full time. Not now anyway. My kids are still small. They still need my time and attention. I know how time consuming blogging and posting and taking photos of each step so you can share a tutorial is and I often wonder “something has to be suffering in these peoples lives”. All of us bloggers paint this perfect picture many times of our lives and our kids and our homes and I’m wondering what the reality really is? I mean, I don’t know any other creative bloggers personally. I’m the oddball creative blogger who lives in NY, remember? lol I have no idea what their family lives are like….whether or not their families are suffering too. I only know that blogging takes it’s toll and at the end of the day, what’s going to matter most? That we shared our creative talent with the world or that we took care of our families? I don’t want my kids to look back at their childhood and remember a mom who was cranky and short-fused and always on her computer. I want them to remember a mom who put them first, who raised them up in the Lord, who loved on them and spent time with them. Right now I’m doing a really crappy job but that’s going to change!
A few weeks ago I started doing a Bible Study with the women at my church. We are doing Beth Moore’s James: Mercy Triumphs. {Amazing Study!} I am getting SO MUCH out if it and I keep on getting confirmation from God that this is what I’m to be doing. One other issue I have (aside from not being a good housekeeper lol) is my mouth. In my frustration with blogging, etc. I have often said things to my children that I shouldn’t. I’ve gotten annoyed and angry even when I was “busy” and they get “bugging “ me. Even before kids, my mouth used to get the better of me. During this time off I’m standing on these Bible verses and applying them to my life:
James 1: 19-21
“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. 20 for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. 21Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. “
So, I’m excited to be taking this time to work on me, in an unselfish way. I’m getting into the Word of God like I have not in AGES and it’s just what I needed. I’m asking God for wisdom and keeping my ears opened. I “plan” on coming back at the beginning of June and I will be really excited to share with you everything that has happened in my own life during this time off. I figure people take vacations from their job, right? Why can’t I take a vacation from blogging?
So, there you have it! I encourage you that if you’ve felt like me, then please, take a break. There is more to this world than blogging. Time away will give you the chance to reevaluate yourselves and your blog. It will help you put things into perspective and maybe even give you some new direction and purpose. 🙂
Thanks for reading this through! See you in June!
3-2-1…..disconnect!
XOXO
Diana
www.thegirlcreative.com
We will miss you…but I so get it. You know I have been struggling with the same things. I just wanted to have fun and I let my blog turn into something bigger than I really wanted. It has diverted attention away from my true goals and my family. In another year, I want to say I did X and X and X with my family, not look at all of my followers.
so BRAVO in seeing the big picture (I may be following in your footsteps soon!)
Good for you! I took a break from blogging and realized that I didn’t miss it at all! It becomes such an all encompassing entity that only when you step away from it can you really see it for what it is. Either you’ll realize you love it and totally miss it and come back with a renewed purpose, or (like me), you’ll realize that you were happier without it in your life. Either way, I think it’s wonderful that you’re taking this “time out”. And I know your children (and your husband!) will be grateful that you did!
You will be missed but do what you need to do!
I applaud you! What a great decision. I haven’t quit but it is taking a back seat to the important things now. Way to go!
Jill of oursevendwarfs.com
Hooray for you. Enjoy your fast…40 days is an important number. Love those babies and take care.
Congrats to you! I completely understand where you are at. I have been s\trying to cut back on blogging as well. Instead of posting everyday, which is what I have basically done for years now, I am down to 4 posts a week and plan to drop to 3 a week and keep it there. My family and real life need me and I need them. And after a lot of prayer regarding this, God has led me to the reality that all things come in moderation. So, have lots of fun with your family and create wonderful memories!
Your post was inspiring. My children are grown and hubby and I love doing projects together. I don’t blog very much but have a shop to make items for. That’s the extent of my on line stuff. Be proud of yourself that you’re putting your family ahead of everything else. I finished the James study with Beth Moore a few weeks ago and seriously it changed my life. You can also find her Wednesdays with Beth on line. I use them as additional bible study. Will be praying for you.
Diana
Lady Like
Good for you! Everyone needs a break from blogging now and then.
I completely support you. I love your blog and your inspiration that you bring me, but this will be so good for you and your family. I know that the Lord appreciates your sacrifice as well.
I love this post — your honesty and realistic perspective.
I have been cutting way back in the blog/FB/etc. world lately, too … and it is SO nice.
These ladies who have perfectly written posts DAY AFTER DAY — (and when they don’t – are apologizing for it on facebook and guaranteeing two more tomorrow!) are beginning to make me a little irritated, to be honest.
Who on earth has time for that!?
At least who – that is in “our” stage of life (which it seems the majority of these women are!).
With young kids at home … and in some of our cases … jobs outside the home, as well — blogging has GOT to be an “extra” – not a daily (or hourly!) obsession!
You know I love you, Diana! And I commend you for writing this — and for taking a well-deserved BREAK! 🙂
Hugs!
~Bec
I can relate in so many ways. Good for you. I will miss you and this blog but I understand and I’ll look forward to seeing you in June 🙂 BTW I’m doing the same study right now and working on memorizing James 🙂
I don’t even want to admit how applicable this post is for me…esp. the laundry part!! Some is from blogging, but some is from other things I have been dealing with lately too! I need to start scheduling a little bit more and giving more time to my babies. Thanks so much for writing this! I appreciate the honesty and hope you have a great break!!
You will never regret following the Lord’s guidance and giving more of yourself to your children and family. You are an inspiration to others and it is obvious that you are a woman of great charachter. Your family is blessed to have you!
Good Job you. Enjoy the 40 days. And thank you…just what I needed to hear today.
This post was a blessing to me today. I’m now turning off my computer for the evening and plan to do a little scheduling of how my computer time relates to my days, and to my life. I hope you come back refreshed!
You may not read this until after you get back, but I want to commend you for what you are doing. I don’t have nearly as big a blog as yours, and I often feel the same way. And then, I too, have to sit back and wonder what is it all for? I want it to be a place for ‘me’ to share can connect with other like-minded people, but not at the expense of my family. So, I only post when I can post and do what I can do. It may not make me a huge blog, but family has to come first. Good luck! 🙂 We will be here when you get back.
Blessings to you as break away. Applauding you as you follow God and your heart. See you when you return refreshed and renewed, with new priorities….
We’ll miss you! But you are so right -family is everything! Good for you for making this commitment. I hope you enjoy the break and have lot of time with your family to enjoy. See you in June and Good luck!
Good for you! I commend you for your decision. Enjoy your time off. We (your followers) will be standing by for your next post.
I rarely read long posts like yours; but it was compelling. For the reasons you stated, I would never do a blog. When the family’s’ needs are placed behind a “blog” with people you don’t even know and will probably never know; reading them, and greedily taking what they want, you are absolutely right to see something wrong with the picture. Good for you; don’t stress out over people you don’t even know. As for numbers; that’s exactly what it is, a number; which has absolutely nothing to do with the quality of your blog. Best of luck to you!
Desi
I just found your blog today but I am going to bookmark it so I can return in June. I love the honesty in your writing…rare these days! Good Luck to you and see you in 40!
My own children are grown now, when they were growing up there was no internet or blogging to distract me, but there are always things outside the home that can distract form the attention needed for your home and family. Of course your followers will miss you, but your children are already missing you. In ten years, it won’t matter how many tutorials you posted, but the moments you spend with your children and husband, no matter how mundane they seem, will be the foundation for your future happiness and theirs. Blessings to you and your family. May your 40 days away from your blog give you clarity of purpose and a respite from the distractions that are interfering with your family life.
As a new blogger I’ve noticed that I’m on the computer a lot and my 3 little girls are too noticing. Because it is the first thing I’ve done for “me” in such a long time I’m going to stick with it. BUT, thank you for the warnings. I’ve allocated certain times that I’m allowed on the computer and I am, in these early days, trying to find a balance for it all. Hope your 40 days goes well x
You are so smart and honest! You are so right and we’ve all been there, I’m sure. I wish you blessings aned peace during your time off. Know you’ll be missed by us and we’ll look forward to “seeing” you again soon!
Enjoy your break! When you come back, and you’d like to know a blogger personally, let me know – I’m in NY too!
Good for you. I’m kind of going in the opposite extreme. My husband is unemployed and I’m trying to build up my blog to help support us. My youngest are 13 and 14 and we homeschool as well. I can feel the resentment bubbling up inside because it is my husband’s responsibility to provide for us. Yet I need to be obedient if this is the direction God is leading me. It is so hard! Some of my children are adopted and this brings on added stress with their emotional difficulties and the stress it puts on me. Thank you for sharing and God bless your time away!
I know you probably won’t be reading this until June, but I want you to know that I am PROUD OF YOU! You are being the Proverbs 31 woman our Lord has designed you to be. God bless you and keep you during this ‘sabatical’ and I’m excited to ‘see’ you again after your break.
Barbara @ Chase the Star
you are a SUPER STAR!!!!! sending you hugs and blessings and we will see you when we see you!
I hope you enjoy your break – I think all bloggers understand where you come from. I had 2 blogs and reduced it to one – Now with one blog I am only posting once a week – because family needs to come first. Hope you do come back 🙂
I am doing that same study and it has been eye opening and mouth shutting!! It is very eerie that I have been going through about the same struggle as you with the whole being a slave to my stats and followers numbers etc. and saying I want this to be about God! What a croc! It is purely pride on my part and I am on my knees for guidance.
I will be praying the same thing for you and enjoy this time with GOd and your children. I cannot wait to hear from yo in June and hear all the amazing things God taught you during your time with Him.
Kim@reposhture.blogspot.com
What a heartfelt post. Glad you have the perspective to do what you know is right for you and your family. Only you know the right path. Enjoy all of your new minutes to spend with your family. 🙂
Karah
Good for you! I often wonder about these young mom bloggers. How do they do it? I am a empty nester now and I barely have time for my blog. I just take one day at a time and God is faithful! I pray that He will help you to redeem the time while you are away and give you wisdom for your future!
Blessings to you and your family!
Lori @ http://www.thestonybrookhouse.com
That’s awesome! God always has a way of pointing out the things that take up too much time in our lives. Enjoy your time off with your family! I will be praying for you.
Amber
http://www.recipeswelove.net
The Lord will honor your commitment to Him, your family and yourself. When this has happened to me I am also not happy because I am not being true to who God has made me. Isn’t God so gracious to show us what we need to do and then open our hearts to move forward on that, your definitely blessed to have had him OPen the eyes of your heart! Blessings on your journey!
~Mari
Great post and good for you for doing what is best for your family! You are an awesome inspiration, but you are so right about what is going to matter in the end! Enjoy this time with your family!
Thank you for sharing your heart. Family is always the most important thing — and it starts with mommy taking care of mommy! Blessings.
Oh dear! I think that I could have written this post. I’m going to need to really take this as a sign.
Bless you for stepping up to be a great mom!
Wow – thank you for sharing this! I’m in the same boat. I waited for the Lord’s leading to start my blog and have asked Him to continue guiding me. Funny thing my husband said the other day – “We should really be making the kids help more with the laundry” – what he meant was, you’re not keeping up on it – LOL. I just read that verse in James – so much wisdom in that book of the Bible. Thanks again – have a great break and God bless!
When you are older, you will cherish the memories of this time spent with your precious children and family so much more than your blog. Best of luck!
right on!! enjoy the time with the people you love (and with your washing machine!). i’ll miss your creative posts… but, honestly, it will give me a bit more time to disconnect from reading in the blogosphere as well. 🙂
I can relate to this very well I’m afraid. It’s one of the reasons I’ve been slack about posting recently. I need to get things into perspective as well. We’ll all be here when you come back! (and you’ll come back. eventually. it’s too hard to stay away!)
You will surely be missed, but having felt the same way you do – I find it refreshing to hear it spoken by another blogger who has a pretty BIG blog! Take your time, be with your children and your family, reconnect with the lord! The stress of it all does get to you! My blog is reletively small and I am able limit my blogging to those times I am not taking away from them! I commend what you are doing and will be here when you decide to come back!
Good for you! I’ll be praying that your efforts will be blessed. When we put God first, He makes it all work out.
Totally excited for you. God will meet you and your family! Don’t hurry back allow God to complete His sweet work in you. Much care.
Good for you! I’m actually feeling a lot the same. I’m scaling back my blogging BIG TIME and see if that is enough. I wish you all the best in your “fast”.
Thanks. I feel the same way too! How do some of these people do it all? I made a commitment that family and housework come first, Blogging is second. Since I have done this. Things have worked out much better. I am even getting more hits on my blog. I have decided to stress less.
Amy @ Pounds4Pennies
I love your blog. But family comes first. Always. I think it’s hard to find that balance. I’m still trying. Thank you for this post, it makes the rest of us realize that we’re not the only ones who feel this way. (((hugs)))
I am so impressed with your decision!! God will truly bless you for your decision. Thanks for sharing this with us. It spurs me on to good works. Barb
This is so wonderful for you to share. I am a new blogger and I too have little children that need my attention. This will help me in the future if this takes up a lot of my time. I will think back to this post, most definitely. I too am a christian woman and I feel the same way you do. Sometimes life can be difficult, but God is right there beside you always, guiding you along in life. He will make sure you make the right choices and apparently he has done just that. Good luck and I look forward to future posts in 40 days!!!
As much as I love the world of blogging, it can get overwhelming & take over you life. I have taken a much needed break in the past when blogland was just to much and it did help. I too once again have a large mountain of laundry and a messy house. I have started to let it consume me and know I need to breath and slow down. We can’t miss out on our children as they wont always be little and certainly wont always want us around. There has to be a balance somewhere and I am working on that myself. Breathe deep, relax, and enjoy life for awhile mama!
As much as I love the world of blogging, it can get overwhelming & take over you life. I have taken a much needed break in the past when blogland was just to much and it did help. I too once again have a large mountain of laundry and a messy house. I have started to let it consume me and know I need to breath and slow down. We can’t miss out on our children as they wont always be little and certainly wont always want us around. There has to be a balance somewhere and I am working on that myself. Breathe deep, relax, and enjoy life for awhile mama!
I took a few months off to reevaluate and regroup. I was overwhelmed with blogging and take over. I love the direction I am going in now but still find i have a HUGE mountain of laundry and a messy house. Just last night my husband asked “Do I have any clean underwear?” 🙂 I do try to work when the kids are napping/sleeping at night/or quietly playing. It still have taken over a bit and I to am working on finding a better balance. There has to be better balance right? What is most important? Our children wont always be little nor will they always want us around. Breathe deep, relax, & enjoy your time off mama! FYI…Im from Central NY!
I guess I am lucky enough to have an older child who at 13 has shown me that their childhood FLIES by at the speed light which keeps me from getting as bogged down as you have. I hope you enjoy your time and find your balance. Melody Ross of Brave Girls has spoken of her internet obsession. While she doesn’t specifically speak of it in terms of religion she shares a very spiritual journey if you are interested.
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toko busana muslim
This is the first time I’m visiting your blog and this post is the best thing I’ve ever read. I just started blogging but I’ve been very careful to protect my time with my family. I only post twice a week and I’m ok with that. This is confirmation. I love Beth Moore’s studies. Awesome women of God. I hope your fast only strengthens you. Blessings.
This is great. I totally understand this! I don’t have kids, but I know how much time I’ve devoted to my computer lately. I tried to take a step back and have my time with the Lord, but I got distracted. Thank you sooooo much for this reminder. It really is showing me just how much time I’m blogging, when I could be reading my Bible, praying, etc… I’m going to start getting a hold of my blog and getting it organized, so I can spend more time with my family and the Lord. I’m not ready to take a large break from my blog, with lots of big things coming up, but I now know that I can definitely make God my first priority and blogging after that. Thanks again for this!
Wonderful decision! Enjoy your time to refocus! Whatever you decide, we’ll support and understand!
I don’t even know you and am not sure how i came onto this page, but let me give you a hearty AMEN to your decision! Whatever claims our time and energy and emotion apart from our first priorities NEEDS to be examined, and I love that you have listened to God’s voice on this, and your family is really going to love it!! 🙂
Take it from a friend who is a lot further down the road, your family and the time with them goes so fast, and all of our dreams for them are being formed right now, during these days that they are in your home.
So good going!
Blessings to you and your family.
Sonja
PRAISE THE LORD!!!!
It is way to easy to let so many things consume our time and we forget our “true purpose”….to know God and make Him known!!!! Bravo to you for choosing to walk away from the idol and put your focus back on your kids, home and relationship with the Lord. You won’t be sorry and I believe you will be blessed! Let it be a reminder to all of us to keep it simple saints – KISS principle!!!!
Blessings,
Linda
Wow- I am glad that I only found your blog now, while I only have to wait a few more days to read your next post! I am just beginning this blogging journey and am wanting to make sure that it doesn’t become consuming, or completely egocentric. I think you will have something to teach us all when you come back. Thank you for your honesty, and your commitment to do the right thing. Blessings
Boy that hit home!! I think I got some major conviction reading this…I am glad you had the gall to say what many of us want to say, but dont. Good for you…I have been failing as a wife and mother because I am new to blogging, but it is so time consuming. I am having to set certain times and days to devote to it so I dont go overboard. Glad I am learning this early! Thanks for being BLUNT and speaking TRUTH!
Awesome post. Thanks for sharing.
Looooooooooooooove this post, Di! We are writing ours up today and it will go live tonight 🙂 Thanks for the inspiration! Here’s to being a more involved, fun mom! XOXO
I found your blog post through another blog on Pinterest. I just want you to know that even though this post was done last year, the words are LOUD AND CLEAR in my mind.
You have inspired me to take the plunge and I’ll be taking a break of my own very soon. This has been on my mind for awhile now and this post just gave me the green light. Thank you!