My Husband has no “Drawers” in his Drawers….(A Confession)

….and something’s gotta give!

I hope the title of this post got your attention. I know it got my husbands as I left the draft opened on my laptop. lol After I explained to him why I chose the title, he was OK with me letting the world know that he has no clean undies in his drawer. 😉

Okay, so………I’ve tried writing this post a few times already and I had a really hard time putting my thoughts into words but I will try.

Get ready for the ultimate confession.

Blogging and my time on the computer has consumed me. My laundry is out of control (and that is probably the understatement of the year). My kids feel like they aren’t important. My relationship with God and my family has suffered. It’s time for a change. FINALLY.

God has been speaking to my heart for such a long, long time regarding this matter. I shared with my contributors in an email recently and with my dear friend, Dawn, that I’ve made blogging, this blog, blog surfing, blog envy, social media, etc. an idol. My blog stats have stressed me out. Wondering why my numbers (pageviews) have dropped has had me cranky and frustrated. My poor husband literally has not had clean “drawers” in his dresser drawers in months. I rummage through clean baskets of laundry every.single.day so that he, me and the kids have something clean to wear. THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE!

And my husband, he has been SO patient with me. He knows how important my blog, having time to do something for “me” is but I can’t keep on like this. I’m constantly feeling like I live in chaos. Always rushing out to get  my kids to school on time (most days by the skin of my teeth) because what am I doing? Checking Facebook, my email, my blog, etc. My family needs to know and FEEL how important THEY are to me. The other day my oldest daughter (who has been acting out something fierce lately) starts crying and says “You never play with us. All you care about is your blog. You’re always on the computer”. Thankfully God had already been working on my heart and preparing me for what I’m going to say next so I was able to admit to her that she was right and that I was going to do something about it.

I’m taking a break. It’s going to be more like a fast. I need to do this. I’m shooting for 40 days. During that time I will not be checking Facebook or Twitter and I will not be blogging. I am disabling my Twitter and Facebook apps on my phone as well as my emails. I can’t stay offline completely due to other obligations but I will be limiting those times to after bedtime or nap time.

I recently read a post on blog etiquette and it got me thinking of all these bloggers who have turned their blogs into a full time business. And while I’ve made money blogging and it’s come in handy many times, I often thought that I just don’t think I could do this full time. Not now anyway. My kids are still small. They still need my time and attention. I know how time consuming blogging and posting and taking photos of each step so you can share a tutorial is and I often wonder “something has to be suffering in these peoples lives”. All of us bloggers paint this perfect picture many times of our lives and our kids and our homes and I’m wondering what the reality really is? I mean, I don’t know any other creative bloggers personally. I’m the oddball creative blogger who lives in NY, remember? lol I have no idea what their family lives are like….whether or not their families are suffering too. I only know that blogging takes it’s toll and at the end of the day, what’s going to matter most? That we shared our creative talent with the world or that we took care of our families? I don’t want my kids to look back at their childhood and remember a mom who was cranky and short-fused and always on her computer. I want them to remember a mom who put them first, who raised them up in the Lord, who loved on them and spent time with them. Right now I’m doing a really crappy job but that’s going to change!

A few weeks ago I started doing a Bible Study with the women at my church. We are doing Beth Moore’s James: Mercy Triumphs. {Amazing Study!} I am getting SO MUCH out if it and I keep on getting confirmation from God that this is what I’m to be doing. One other issue I have (aside from not being a good housekeeper lol) is my mouth. In my frustration with blogging, etc. I have often said things to my children that I shouldn’t. I’ve gotten annoyed and angry even when I was “busy” and they get “bugging “ me. Even before kids, my mouth used to get the better of me. During this time off I’m standing on these Bible verses and applying them to my life:

James 1: 19-21

“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. 20 for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. 21Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. “

So, I’m excited to be taking this time to work on me, in an unselfish way. I’m getting into the Word of God like I have not in AGES and it’s just what I needed.  I’m asking God for wisdom and keeping my ears opened. I “plan” on coming back at the beginning of June and I will be really excited to share with you everything that has happened in my own life during this time off. I figure people take vacations from their job, right? Why can’t I take a vacation from blogging?

So, there you have it! I encourage you that if you’ve felt like me, then please, take a break. There is more to this world than blogging. Time away will give you the chance to reevaluate yourselves and your blog. It will help you put things into perspective and maybe even give you some new direction and purpose. 🙂

Thanks for reading this through! See you in June!

3-2-1…..disconnect!