Why I’m Tossing Blog Etiquette Out the Window
In April I announced a blogging break. It was more like a 40 day fast from blogging, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest……any kind of social media that would distract me from my family and my priorities at home. If you missed that post you can find it HERE.
During that time I found myself faced with a whole range of feelings and emotions. It went anywhere from never wanting to blog again to wanting to blog but feeling like God wanted me to surrender it completely; to starting a whole new blog with a completely different direction to wanting to continue this blog but the way I wanted to. Not the way I thought I “should” but the way that I (me) wanted to. And while I’m still not sure what I’m going to do or what direction I will officially take, I do know this: I’m blogging the way that I want. And that statement doesn’t mean that I’m not going *try* to let God lead me and give me direction but just that I’m not going to succumb to the pressure of blog etiquette and the do’s and don’ts of blogging. Let me explain why.
A few weeks before I took my break I had read a series on blogging etiquette, etc. (I’m purposely not providing a link to the series I’m referring to just because I don’t want any negative thoughts going towards that particular blogger). While the posts were great and had so many valid points I found myself unsettled with the whole idea of blog etiquette. Now, in the past I have written a post or 2 on this very topic. Since then, my focus and my thoughts on the matter have changed. I was starting to take issue within myself about the blogger I had become. While I would NEVER call any of the bloggers I have come to know or admire snooty (because they are not – they are so sweet!) I found the whole idea of blog etiquette, well, kind of snooty. And I found myself feeling a bit snooty too! Does that make sense? I don’t want to tell someone how they should run their blog, what they should blog about, what they should or shouldn’t say in a comment, how they should host a party, what kind of emails they should or shouldn’t send another blogger, know what I mean? It’s not my job. The blogging world is HUGE. And everyone has an opinion. And there is plenty of room in it for all sorts of bloggers. Be the blogger that you want to be!
- I’m going to blog about whatever I want. If I feel like blogging about my family, I will. If I feel like sharing a project, I will. If I feel like talking about my faith in Jesus, I will.
- I’m going to blog whenever I want. If I want to blog everyday, I will. If a week or 2 goes by without a blog post or a party, then so be it. I’m not going to get wrapped up in a schedule or put undue pressure on myself and family for the sake of this blog.
- I’m taking this blog back. From now on, all blog posts will be from me. I will no longer be having contributors or guest posts. And until further notice, I will not be adding any new sponsors. I will continue my affiliate relationships though so there will still be ads here.
- I’m not going to not share something I’ve worked on just because I’ve seen it a hundred times somewhere else. If I create something that I’m really proud of and want to share it, I will.
- I may or may not share tutorials of my projects. Sometimes the whole idea of that is tedious and daunting so I may just show you the end result. 🙂
- I removed my followers gadget. I don’t want to get hung up on numbers. You can still subscribe via email and follow me on Facebook and Twitter using the links in the sidebar.
That’s basically it. I just really want to enjoy blogging again and I think these are the steps to getting me there.
I should probably add a little disclaimer: This post is definitely NOT about growing your blog. If you want to grow your blog or turn it into a business then by all means follow all of the rules of blogging and blog etiquette that you have found online. And I’m definitely NOT discouraging anyone from wanting those things. I just know from my own personal experience that I just don’t want to go in that direction anymore. And I’m not saying that I will never want those things again but for now, my family needs me and “blogging for me” is the approach I’m taking. 🙂
XOXO
Diana
www.thegirlcreative.com
Nicely said! I completely agree with your choice. I recently have become very down on myself…I started my blog almost a year ago with the intentions I would share my talents and gifts that God gave me with others hopefully inspiring them to be creative as well. I had intended that this blog would hopefully develop and turn into a career of sorts for me, so that when both my boys are in school I would only have to work for myself and no one else doing what I adore. But recently I’ve been obsessed with my numbers, why it’s not growing like I want it too. Don’t get me wrong I’m totally blessed that 436 GFC followers like me enough to say so, and that some of my projects have been big hits. That makes me feel so incredibly special. But I’ve been observing another blog that started after mine and is taking off faster than mine, granted this blogger has already started with sponsors and paid ads and I haven’t…so maybe that is part of the growth. I promised myself I wouldn’t take on sponsors unless I felt my blog was in excellent form and would give those sponsors a beautiful place to advertise if they wanted. I just haven’t felt that I’m there yet, and to be truthful I’m nervous about adding sponsors. I don’t know if I want to deal with all of that yet. I find it hard to believe that if you have a quality blog with great content that your blog can’t grow just based on that. I am trusting that God knows what direction he wants to lead me and that if this is what my career shall be then he will get me there. I’m learning to not stress about it and I strongly believe what you said…it’s MY blog and should only be about the things I’m passionate about and what I would love to read and write about. 🙂 Thanks for sharing this!
Oh. My. Goodness. This is sooo what I decided to do a couple months ago! I’m not a big time famous blogger like yourself 😉 but I was trying to be, and I didn’t like who that person was becoming and frankly neither did my family. My kids would say something like “hey mom, why don’t you blog about this, what we are doing right now?” and I would think to myself ‘because it won’t get me more readers’. How lame is that?! I became ashamed of the way blogging was even taking over my thoughts. Since I’ve started doing whatever the heck I feel like, I’m a lot happier. I also am not a fan of the whole blog swap contributor thing! If you don’t have enough content or time to blog everyday then just don’t blog that day. NO biggy. I realize people are trying to make money but it kinda becomes no fun (and no fun to read other peoples blogs) when money making becomes the main focus. All right, even if you didn’t have time to read my big long comment I feel better having read your post and knowing I’m not the only one doing this. Would you mind if I quoted some of this in the future? Or just linked this post on my blog? You’re awesome!! Keep doing what YOU want to do!
I am so glad I came across your blog and this post!! I’ve only been blogging for… well, 2 months today! And I’ve been feeling completely overwhelmed and pressured. I feel so much better after reading your post. Thank you for reminding me that my blog… is my blog! 🙂
Love this post!!! I have been changing too. Cutting back to just whenever. The only thing I really post is my party. But like you said, I want to post when I want and what I want. I am not pushing ads anymore and don’t even worry about the follower numbers either. I haven’t deleted it, but haven’t tried in a long while to invite anyone. You inspired me to change some more things of which I will do today. I started this blog of mine to enjoy it and not stress about a schedule. I have cut way back in the past few months and it is so refreshing to just post when I feel like it. 😉 And I find that my readers are totally fine with it which makes me feel good. I am glad I read your post today. Thank you! Also, thank you for including me in the past with the link parties. ;D Hope you had a fantastic 4th of July with your family. Tara @Trendy Treehouse
Hi Diana, Thank you for your honesty in this post. As a fan of yours, I wanted to say that I totally support you in these goals/plans. It is so difficult not to fall into the trap of someone else’s definition of blogging success. I am also trying to just be me, to blog about WHATEVER & to resist feeling like I have to please prospective followers. Thanks for being an inspiration!
Warmly, Michelle
I TOTALLY understand. I noticed I started to hate blogging because I was trying to follow certain rules that don’t really exist.
I decided to make my blog be more about me and things that really interest me. For example, I’m a Christmas nut and have Christmas stuff all month (this month). I love the funny pictures on facebook, so I post my favorites every Saturday. I love to look around blogland at crafts and recipes, so I share those on Fridays. I love the Psalms so I’m starting a praying psalms Sunday thing. With a linky party on Thursday, that just leaves me Mon-Wed to have “meat” on my blog. I have taken full advantage of the scheduling blog posts thing. I have about a month ahead of time and I plan on working on more so I don’t put the computer ahead of everyone else.
I am so guilty of that and it’s hard to break!
You definitely inspired me
I’m in your camp and have been blogging about similar issues (though no comparison because I’m still new and you are established) …
… but have come to the conclusion that I need to make blogging a reward system. For me, it’s a drug. And sometimes I have a bad trip (like when I compare myself to other bloggers). The choice is rehab or moderation. I’m gonna try moderation first (yea, yea, words uttered from an addicts mouth) …
Thanks for sharing and being so honest and raw. Scary, right? Inspiring? Absolutely …
🙂
Linda
All I can say is you go girl!
Kelly
Three cheers!!! Thank you for this post!:)
This post is a breath of fresh air! I felt so free just reading it. I have all the same worries about my blog – trying to keep up with a post schedule, worrying about my posts being relevant to my niche and not too much about my family or not too much Jesus stuff, but I love love LOOOOVE this post so much. Because it is okay to take back your own blog. Thank you!!
Kelly at View ALong the Way
http://www.viewalongtheway.com
This post is perfect! I have had a very bad run with the “blog” rules that really effected me and made me almost quit blogging all together!
But then I thought wait why am I following anyone’s RULES for blogging?? its crazy since Blogging is your own voice its your view on the world and your everyday life so it should be about My RULES whats right for me and my blog ….
And since I got over that Bad moment in my blog history I have been really loving blogging again .
So proud of you for writing this post ..
Hugs
Brooke
What a wonderful and refreshing blog/attitude! God will surely bless you for a wise decision. And from the rest of the comments, I’d say that not only are you on the right track, you’re also an inspiration for many bloggers (and followers) out there.
I’ve been thinking about doing a food blog for over a year. I’ve been told I “really should” do this from many well meaning friends – some who have successful blogs of their own. I’ve even started taking pictures of the step-by-step process in making my own home meals and desserts. (OMG, what a lot of work! Stop everything and take a picture… wait, it’s blurry… wait, the camera steamed up… etc.) I know God has spoken to me about the best use of my time and making sure HE doesn’t get left out in my every day life. This is what’s held me back from entering the wonderful world of blogging.
Thanks to you I feel like all of the time constraints and extra effort might not have to take over my entire life and every extra second that isn’t taken by my job, family, gym (ZUMBA!), home and cat. Since God gets every second, regardless of what I’m doing, I figure He’s not first on the list, but takes the whole thing. Thank you so much! I wish you much success and would like to be added to your followers list.
I am with you. When I moved to WordPress, I already lost my GFC. So, when I moved, I didn’t put the Linky thing on b/c I just didn’t want to see those numbers on my blog. I put too much pressure on myself to keep up and then I burn out.
I wasn’t meaning to take any sort of break this summer, in fact, quite the opposite. I wanted to ramp it up, since the boys are on summer break (we home-school), but I’m tired. I haven’t posted in two weeks, and I was getting ancy that I needed to post SOMETHING. And now, I just figure, I’ll post again when I feel inspired.
CONGRATULATIONS to you and Thank you! Apparently, I’ve been blissfully unaware of the “rules”. I write about whatever strikes me whenever I have the time or the inclination. I have a family and a full time job that come first. Luckily for me, the people who follow me don’t seem to mind! I’m your newest follower and I look forward to whatever you share, whenever you do it! xo, Kimberly
This post was very inspiring and validating . Thank you .
My thoughts and what I’ve been feeling are pretty much summed up in this post. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing this. I started blogging in 2010 as a personal blog for me to share my story and vent.
http://obsessedanalyst.blogspot.com/2011/11/gods-amazing-healing-power-really.html
It was for me, I didn’t really care what others thought. Recently I have a new blog for my crafts. As I was learning to create my new blog and making it better, I found myself reading about blog etiquette. I read all the things to do to create a better blog. I kept editing. I was falling into the trap of making it appealing to others. Now reading your post, I feel convicted to stick to doing it for fun and myself. Thank you!
Thank you for this. Definitely something for me to reflect on and include in my prayers as I have two blogs going right now.
Funny that I should see this post from some link on Facebook, because this is how I have been feeling a bit, too. I started Thrift Diving as a spin off to my “house blog” that was about me documenting all the crazy wallpaper removals….painting….repairs…etc….And decided that I wanted it to be more focused on decorating (mostly) through thrift stores. I have put myself under SO much pressure because I am trying to turn things out and grow my blog, but I have also sacraficed my family/marriage/time to do other things for the sake of the blog. And I think I have lost my way a little, in the quest for having a successful blog that with tons of traffic (which hasn’t happened YET). But your post just liberated me to being/doing what I want, and if people don’t like it, they can @*$) it! 🙂
Thanks for putting words to what I have been feeling lately!
Serena
Thrift Diving